Virtues Training Living a Joy-Filled Life
  • Home
  • Mentoring
  • For Couples
  • Online Courses
    • Virtues Project Facilitator Program
    • Introduction to The Virtues Project Online Course
    • A Pace of Grace
    • The Art of Listening
  • Shop
  • About Us
    • Betsy Lydle Smith & Pete Smith
    • Virtues Training
    • Partnering Facilitators
    • The Virtues Project™
    • What our Clients are Saying
    • FAQ
    • Client List
  • Workshops
    • Calendar of Events
    • For Schools & Organizations
    • For Parents
    • Introduction to The Virtues Project
    • For Personal Growth
    • Intentional Grandparenting
    • Become a Facilitator
  • Blog
  • Pace of Grace Free Webinar
  • Contact Us

A Virtues Moment: Love

11/2/2015

0 Comments

 
Picture
Virtues Reflection Card courtesy of The Virtues Project™

Virtues in Action

Picture
​Nowhere are virtues more prominent then when someone dies.  David Brooks, in his new book, The Road to Character, talks about Eulogy Virtues and Resume Virtues.  This week, I've had the opportunity to remember my mother, who passed away last week at the age of 97, for her "eulogy" virtues.  I've been thinking about which virtues I want to speak about at her memorial service with our family.  I've also reflected on the virtues I've been able/challenged to develop in my long journey the past seventeen years with Mom, as she and I both aged together.  Many of those years I found extremely difficult, as we worked through many mother/daughter issues.  I felt overly responsible for many of her choices.  She wanted to stay independent as long as possible, often railing and angry about the ravages of age, including hearing loss, macular degeneration and dementia.  It was hard for me to balance responsibility as her child who was nearby, with joy and self-care.  It was all tied together with love and commitment: love for each other and other family members, and commitment to be helpful and caring the last years of her life.  In the end, she died as she lived, on her own terms, as much as possible.  Most people called her feisty!  And I got to practice patience, acceptance, respect, and loyalty as well as endurance and perseverance, not always gracefully I must admit.  But there was always Love.

Betty Fontaine Garin was born in New York City in 1918. She was a proud New Yorker her whole life, even though she lived in Virginia, California and Washington.  She lost both parents by the age of fifteen and was sent to live with her brother and his wife, who weren't much older.  She married her high school sweetheart and was a devoted wife and mother to their three children.  Family was always most important to her. She renewed her life after a very difficult divorce by moving to the ocean, where she found peacefulness and healing through walking on the beach and new friendships.  She found great happiness with her second husband Steve Garin and they traveled extensively until his death in 1999.  She persevered, moving to an independent senior community, then to assisted living and finally to memory care, until she and her belongings were pared down to her basic essence.  She didn't always accept these changes gracefully, but she kept her dignity until the end.  Some of the virtues I honor my mother for are love, dedication to family, perseverance and endurance, determination, consideration, patience, sacrifice, strength, and gratitude.  I miss you and love you, Mom.  I know you are dancing in the "Great Beyond."
0 Comments



Leave a Reply.

    A Virtues Moment Blog

     

    Sign up now!

    ​Author

    Betsy Lydle Smith publishes a monthly blog titled, "A Virtues Moment"  Sign up NOW!

    Archives

    May 2020
    April 2020
    March 2020
    July 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    March 2019
    December 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    June 2018
    March 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    November 2017
    October 2017
    February 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015
    November 2015
    October 2015

    Categories

    All

    RSS Feed

Betsy Lydle Smith
(425) 753-6498

betsy@virtuestraining.com
Copyright 2020 Virtues Training
Website by Lotus Connections LLC
  • Home
  • Mentoring
  • For Couples
  • Online Courses
    • Virtues Project Facilitator Program
    • Introduction to The Virtues Project Online Course
    • A Pace of Grace
    • The Art of Listening
  • Shop
  • About Us
    • Betsy Lydle Smith & Pete Smith
    • Virtues Training
    • Partnering Facilitators
    • The Virtues Project™
    • What our Clients are Saying
    • FAQ
    • Client List
  • Workshops
    • Calendar of Events
    • For Schools & Organizations
    • For Parents
    • Introduction to The Virtues Project
    • For Personal Growth
    • Intentional Grandparenting
    • Become a Facilitator
  • Blog
  • Pace of Grace Free Webinar
  • Contact Us